I hear artists can have trouble putting the first mark on the canvas and I think I have been having the same difficulty.
Now I have done it I find myself at a loss for words. So much has been passing through my mind planning what I wanted to do, then ............
Not really even that sure why I want to do this. I just feel driven.
I find myself at a strange point in my life, well it feels that way. I am approaching 50. So what is the big deal? For me their are thoughts and feeling arising that are new and at times overwhelmingly confusing.
I have been on a journey of investigation into finding that thing that is best known as God. Other words such as Truth, Spirit, Peace, Freedom and Love have been used at times, to make it more palatable to different people.
I can see how I have passed from one teaching to another. Taken on beliefs, professing them to be true, trying them on like a suit. They would appear to fit for a while and then I would find that they never totally fit comfortably. I would evangelise about them to others believing for a while that I had found the answer.
The list seems endless - Food, Zen, TM, Rebirthing, NLP, A Course in Miracles to name a few.
So what is the difference now? I want to jump in with an answer, only there is not one ready to hand. That is part of the discomfort, certainly not a pat answer. Maybe it is the other way round, an answer is emerging for me, I am just not comfortable with it.
A ramble I know, but better to come I hope.
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